Taylor Swift. Kanye West. Enough.

Straight links today, they’ve been gone too long:

your album already will sell 5 million copies. enough with the kanye stuff

your album already will sell 5 million copies. enough with the kanye stuff

Am I the only one who doesn’t care about the Taylor Swift-Kanye West thing? Didn’t it happen, like, a year ago or something? Why are we still talking about it now? Was it that bad in the first place? This is why it doesn’t matter — because I can barely remember. But you know who does care? West and Swift, who both have albums coming out in the next couple months and who both still are answering questions about it. Swift even wrote a song about it! A song! So in 40 years, we’ve gone from the neglected son of an out-of-control dad and weirdo mom as the inspiration for great music to a certifiable nutjob jumping on an award show stage for 10 seconds as a muse. Evolution, baby. Gotta love it. As much as I didn’t want to, the pull of the VMAs was unavoidable last night. Longtime readers might remember my love affair with the VMAs, I’ve now seen every single one of them live, and I think it’s one of the few pop culture staples that has been introduced, peaked and sunk in my lifetime. It’s just become of a shell of itself over the past five years, so much so that I try not to watch. And that opening, unfunny Chelsea Handler-Lindsay Lohan thing is a perfect example of why I stopped watching. So I watched the first hour until Mad Men come on. And for that first hour, it was a whole bunch of nothing going on. I’m a Chelsea Handler fan, but her opening monologue was forgettable in every way. The Eminem-Rihanna opener was pretty good, but everything after that almost put me to sleep. Maybe next year.

So the weekend I decide to go to the movies for the second time this year (finally saw Inception over the weekend, complete A, lived up to every ounce of hype), that was the lowest-grossing weekend of the year. Perfect timing! Not that there should have been much doubt. Opening weekend of the NFL, the biggest day of September college football anyone could remember, the upcoming start of awards season — it was a recipe for box office disaster. Which makes it more impressive that Resident Evil: Afterlife was able to scare up $27.7 million on such a down weekend. Good move by Sony to release it on this weekend though, with no competition and a dedicated fan base to make sure at least some people would come out.

But for every Inception, there are 100 creatively decrepit movie releases that are just stale retreads we’ve seen a trillion times before. Here’s my quick take in Inception: I have no idea where something like that comes from. As a writer, I like to think that if I really wanted to, I could write an original movie about something no one has ever seen before. Apparently there aren’t other people who think the same way, they’d rather just write the same movie over and over again. I know exactly how those movies are written, and usually after watching the first five minutes, I could write the rest of the script and be 90 percent spot-on. But Inception … I just have no idea where that came from, or how anyone could conjure up something like that. That’s the issue most people have with reboots — they’re just retreads we’ve already seen. I can’t be the only person aspiring for Hollywood to be the place that turns out more Inceptions, not Resident Evil 5.

It’s hard to tell in my own brain whether I’m fascinated by the Joaquin Phoenix documentary I’m Still Here or whether I think it’s a total crock of shat. I’m leaning toward the latter. So it’s tough to think about spending money to go see it when at any time, the rug can be completely pulled out from under me and everyone has a nice laugh at the expense of everyone who shelled out $10 to see the movie. But if you really want to see it, no one will hold it against you.

Office fans seem to be split down the middle on the future of the show. It’s almost like the political landscape these days. There’s a camp that think the show will be just fine when Steve Carell leaves (the Republicans) and another that thinks the show is dead in the water (the Obama camp). Together, those groups make up about 90 percent of the audience. Then there is that radical group that wants the whole thing blown up and started all over again with a replacement name so far off the radar — like Harvey Keitel — it doesn’t even possible (like the Tea Party). It sounds like the show has everything together, though. They have a tryout plan in place, and it sounds like they have some names ready to go in case the tryout plan doesn’t work. The show’s producers have given us no reason not to trust them, so just hearing that there actually is a succession plan is good to hear. By next September, this is all going to be worked out and hopefully the show will be just as good as it’s ever been.

just in case you thought everyone hasn't moved on from heroes, we give you lemon drop

just in case you thought everyone hasn't moved on from heroes, we give you lemon drop

For those of you clamoring for a Heroes TV-movie, like the one that was alluded to when NBC canceled the show last fall, there’s some bad news. So all four of you that weren’t completely turned off by the show by the time it ended and still want some kind of movie, you’re going to be disappointed with the revelation that TV movie ain’t happening. At least it sure doesn’t look like it. All parties have moved on. It’s probably for the best.

My college buddies are once again in Toronto for something like the eighth straight year, and for the eighth straight year, here I am writing about how jealous I am of them and their ability to pick up and leave to watch a week’s worth of movies while I worry about how the trip would screw up the rest of my vacation time, how much hassle it would be and how much it would cost. At least this year, the list of movies coming to the festival isn’t terribly appealing and it’s pretty much guaranteed that anything that plays well there will end up in our local theaters. So at least there’s that. Gotta stop thinking about this, getting angry.

Oh, really? Does Joe Montana mean to tell us that Rudy wasn’t the biggest thing in the history of Notre Dame football? That Hollywood somehow got a hold of this story and possibly stretched the truth just a little? Thanks for the heads up, Joe. Because no one who knows how to type “Google” didn’t know that already. I hate Notre Dame, it took me a couple years before I could even watch it because I knew it was, for the most part, a piece of fiction that had been turned into the Gospel of Notre Dame football. But it’s a really, really good movie. If nothing else, it gave us the meeting place of Vince Vaughn and Jon Favreau. So even if you hate Notre Dame, hate Rudy, hate the Hollywood-ization of true stories into fiction, you at least have to love the fact that without Rudy, there is no Swingers. That’s worth something, even if it also resulted in Couples Retreat.

Didn’t see them, but thought I’d give fans some views of the True Blood and Entourage finales. Good to know this is how Ryan Howard is spending his time instead of in the batting cage:

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