Don’t Let the Door Hit You in the Butt, Terra Nova

Some links:

"i'm smiling because i was the only interesting person in this show"

Good timing! Right after adressing the Terra Nova situation last week, Fox came out and said the show is officially canceled. Apparently Fox doesn’t like it when the network gets bad PopRox publicity. For some reason, no one is calling the show a disaster when it clearly was. Fox spent huge money on this thing, delayed its debut season twice and cut the season order to 13 right from the get-go. It was expecting a big, big, hit — but it got CSI with dinosaurs and low ratings. The show was too much of a hybrid. Maybe if it was about one thing, it could have been successful in any of those niches. But it was part medical drama, part Jurassic Park and part war drama and never seemed to have focus on what it wanted to really concentrate on. So people who wanted to like it (me) who liked one aspect of the show (the Sixers stuff) were left to daydream during the other plot lines waiting for their favorite part to come back. Sorry, I don’t have time for that.

90 minutes of les grossman? yes, please.

Count me squarely in for a Les Grossman movie. There’s a great chance it will be the classic “too much of a good thing” and over-saturate the 15 minutes of screen time Tom Cruise had in Tropic Thunder. But it’s not like Tropic Thunder was a huge, huge hit, so it’s not like anyone would be itching at the bone to get a sequel/spin-off made. And it’s not like Cruise has been parading around campaigning for a Les Grossman movie (like the guy in the next link down there). So maybe, just maybe, the movie is getting a little bit of a push because it actually is a good idea and a good script. Fingers crossed, because I’d love to watch Cruise berate people for another 90 mintues.

Bill and Ted is something we’re supposed to leave alone, isn’t it? The original is a classic, the second one was mostly played out so after 20 years a third one would probably be pretty stupid. Right? Right. That doesn’t seem to be stopping Keanu Reeves, who I guess is the chairman of the “Get Alex Winter Back to Work” committee, a committee that includes him and … Winter. I love Winter’s Twitter message implying the script is something they love, and that’s why he agreed to do it. If someone gave him $10 to do it and told him Keanu wiped his butt with the script, Winter would probably be scrambling around looking for a pen to sign on as many dotted lines as he needed to.

Speaking of things we should leave alone, Elizabeth Olsen is on a campaign of her own to latch on to the Oldboy remake, saying it’s one of her favorite movies of all time. What the hell was going on in that Olsen household? The twins were turned into marketing divas at age 3, and now Elizabeth Olsen is watching Oldboy? She just turned 23, Olboy came out in America in 2004. So, she was watching Oldboy, one of the most unbelievably disturbing movies I’ve ever seen, when she was like 15? Yeesh. No truth to the rumor her parents gave her a carton of Camels for her sweet 16. I don’t want the movie remade because there is no way an American movie could stay true to the most devious plot twist I’ve ever seen, but I also don’t want to see it just in case it can. That’s one movie I’m not spoiling.

awwww. but they looked so happy together.

Sorry, Jason Segel. I’m calling BS on your explanation for why you can’t do the next Muppets movie. He says it’s because his schedule is too packed, with The Five Year Engagement and How I Met Your Mother. But he’s made like 10 movies since he’s been on HIMYM, and this 5-yr Engagement thing is done and coming out in April. One of two things happened: Segel smartly didn’t sign on for any sequels, then told the studio he wanted his movie check, didn’t get it and was cool walking away from whatever the offer was. Or the studio purposely low-balled him so that they could bring new people in for less than what the Segel low-ball offer was. Then it could low-ball the writers and the next star. The studio needed a comedy name attached to the first one to revive the franchise — mission accomplished. Now that the Muppets are officially back, the studio can go back to letting the Muppets be the stars and paying only for cameos. That is, unless you think Jenny from Muppets Take Manhattan is a star. I’m guessing you don’t. In 10 years, you’ll see an interview with Segel saying how cheesed off he was that he never got to the any additional Muppet movies.

Oh, c’mon now. Ryan Murphy makes it really, really hard to trust him sometimes. It’s not just Jessica Lange who will be playing a different character in next season’s American Horror Story, but at least four other stars of last season. They’re all different characters! Why do we want to see that? Wait, do we? No, of course not. It’s pretty stupid to look back at Growing Pains or Night Court now and realize they had the same actors come back in as different characters a couple times (one of them being Brad Pitt in two different Growing Pains episodes as two different characters). It’s also pretty insulting. At least Murphy isn’t trying to hide it like Growing Pains did, he’s completely owning up to it. Not that he’d be able to hide it, but at least we know. I’m at least interested to see how it turns out.

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