Thinking of Eloping? Read this….

In the past eloping was defined as running away to get married, especially without parental consent. But in today’s world it can mean something very different. There are two parts to taking a closer look at elopement: One is the ‘why,’ and the second is ‘the how.’

There are indeed many reasons to elope. Today I’m writing about those reasons, and next week I’ll talk about how to accomplish it.

Eloping can be very romantic.

Eloping does imply secrecy, but there are times when a couple simply wants to get married without guests or fanfare. They may not be keeping it a secret. Good news for couples living here or coming to Pennsylvania: there are no witnesses required for your marriage license, and that makes it all the easier.

Some of the most common reasons couples chose to elope include the following:

Expediency. You need to get married quickly, for reasons such as military deployment or other practical issues, like heath insurance.

Avoiding family conflict is a big one! We all understand that family can be complicated, sometimes just too complicated, and eloping is a great way to simply avoid it. Which is directly connected to the next reason….

Stress! Planning a wedding can be a lot of work. Some couples may have neither the time nor inclination to do it. I have had more than one couple call off their formal wedding and ask to be married quietly in my garden. They simply couldn’t take one more minute of family drama! (and of course I complied.)

Just the two of them!

Finances! You might prefer to spend the money on something else, like a down payment for a house, or a trip. You may not want you or your family to go into debt for one big day. Or you simply cannot afford a lavish wedding and prefer not to settle for something more modest. The average U.S. wedding, according to Reuters, costs more than $27,000, which is the price of a small car. If you’ve dreamed of a romantic getaway, the money you save from the wedding could be used for a trip to Tahiti.

Style. Perhaps you are just a shy couple who would rather not be the center of attention. There may also be cultural and/or religious differences that you don’t know how to negotiate.

Be casual if you wish!

Is it selfish to elope? Perhaps you could see it that way, but it’s still your decision, and for some couples it is really the best decision. While weddings are about families joining together, the time may not be right. For couples who have been married before, they may feel the need to shy away from the entire wedding extravaganza. But, remember, by eloping you may be depriving your family of an important milestone, and you may incur the wrath of grandma for years to come.

There are many ways you can break the big news to the family and have a celebration at a later date, and maybe soothe grandma’s feelings, too. A party after an elopement can be a lot more relaxed that the wedding reception. Today an elopement can be a very good decision. Stay tuned.

Thank you Garth Woods for the beautiful photos.


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