Navigating Social Media for Your Wedding

Many of us are addicted to social media. I recognize that in many ways I am as well. How do we draw the line between using it and abusing it? How do we decide how much social media to use for a wedding?  Some? None? Tons? Here are some thoughts on the subject.


Unplugging for the ceremony is a must! As a celebrant I am keenly aware of how people look at or play with their phones when they should be ‘in the moment.’ I get it, it is truly an addiction. And that is exactly why you should, in no uncertain terms, ask everyone to turn them off and put them away. If you have a professional photographer (and I hope you do, it’s one of the best investments you can make) let them capture the ceremony visually. If you do not have a professional photographer simply designate one or two people to take the pictures. But please, please, do not allow everyone to use their phones during the ceremony. Afterwards – have a blast taking those selfies and other videos and photos. In fact, you can make wedding photography into a business. Plus, youtube likes and views  help a lot when you’re just starting out with your business, so maybe try to purchase them.

Cassie Cook Photography


Many couples create their own hashtag so all the photos on any platform, tagged with their unique tag, can be gathered together. If you choose to do a hashtag, don’t forget to check to be sure someone else isn’t using the same one. A unique hashtag is the way to go.


Social media is great for sharing information about any event. Many couples have wedding websites that can be very helpful … but not everyone is media savvy. Do not expect all of your guests to have all the information if you ONLY send it via social media or even email. They are your guests, I’m assuming you know them pretty well, so be sure those who are not as ‘connected’ get a piece of paper or phone call with all the details, such directions, places to stay, or anything else they might need. Check out here if you need more ideas about how to stay connected to people and invite more people to your wedding without the use of social media.

I’ve seen lots of wedding websites with almost nothing of value. Make sure you have meaningful content if you are going to bother having a website. Directions, things to do, places to stay, how to dress, what to expect, times, locations, photos and other tidbits will make it worthwhile. Otherwise, skip it. You don’t have to have a wedding website!

Please do NOT post any photos of the couple before they have had the opportunity. This is bad form. Sure, put up a photo of yourself looking amazing in your best clothes, but don’t spoil the chance for the couple to share their imagines first. I know it’s frustrating to wait for the professional photos (which sometimes take quite a while) but it will be worth it. Besides, you may not have captured their best side, again, that’s where the professionals come in.

Photo: Allure Productions


If possible, encourage your guests even at the receptionto try to stay off of social media. It’s so much better to be talking to one another, listening to the toasts, enjoying the music, the food, the dancing, the fun, rather than to have your head in your phone. I know it’s hard to say this, but you might ask your DJ or band-leader to mention it a few times and you will be off the hook.


I have had several weddings with family members living far, far away. Live streaming the ceremony made it wonderful for them. They got to see and hear their loved ones getting married even though they were unable to be there in person. Keep this in mind for those who can’t travel, and let your officiant know it’s happening so she or he won’t think something strange is going on.

Overusing social media makes your special day less special. A wedding is many things, but it is not a show. Although there are many great ‘visuals’ involved – the flowers, the clothing, the décor, and so much planning goes into it, it is still an important milestone in life. Keep the meaning of the day foremost in your mind.

Oh, and please follow me on Facebook, Instagram, and Pinterest –  hashtag #LoisHeckmanCelebrant and tag @LoisHeckmanCelebrant.

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