Author Archives: Lois Heckman

To Gift or not to Gift – a brief history

Wedding gifts have been around for a long time, and are thought to have roots in the ‘bride price’ or dowry that was paid to the bride’s family. That usually included land, animals, money, or other forms of what is called ‘historic wealth’ – not exactly a gift, more of a negotiation. The first recorded [...]

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A Marvelous Living Side-by-Side

When working with a couple on their wedding ceremony, I always ask about their family backgrounds. Sometimes it doesn’t resonate for them, it just isn’t important, many identify as a big mix, which they call simply, American. But for others, the history of their families does matter. With about 58 million Americans claiming to be [...]

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One to Remember

Your special, lucky wedding date There are many reasons an engaged couple chooses a specific date for their wedding. They might think of the time of year, the season they prefer, and zero in on a date. Then, when they have found the location, they might discover their chosen date is not available and accept [...]

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Summer dreams

As I sit at my computer watching more snow fall, my thoughts can’t help but drift to warm summer days, and I’m glad I’m not going anywhere to officiate a wedding in a foot of snow. But once I get past the nostalgia, I remember that weddings on a really hot day may bring their [...]

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500 and still going

This marks my 500th column for Pocono Wedding Talk. I can hardly believe it myself. People often ask me how I continue to come up with topics to explore. The answer is, I don’t know. I ask myself: why keep writing? I do have an answer to that. It is because I love being a [...]

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The Quiet Wedding

No two couples are alike, and not everyone wants a big fuss made over their nuptials, yet they still recognize that it is truly one of life’s big milestones and worthy of celebration. At least I hope they do. When I hear a request for a ceremony that is ‘short and sweet’ it is often [...]

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East meets West (in Wedding World)

There is so much wisdom to be found in all traditions, but for those largely unfamiliar with Eastern philosophies and religions, learning about it can be quite a revelation!

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S’mores anyone?

Creating an interactive experience In the 1994 film Forrest Gump, the lead character Forrest Gump famously shared his mama’s advice that:  “… life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get.” Weddings, however are more like S’mores. You create it from different pieces to make something wonderful, and you think you do know what you’ll [...]

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Still Cute, Just Older

Older teens or adults children in weddings I love including children in a wedding ceremony! We often see kids as flower girls or ring bearers. When the children are the children of the couple getting married (rather than say, nieces or nephews) it becomes even more important to involve them in the ceremony. Let them [...]

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Cooking up some wedding fusion

Blending traditions and cultures for an inclusive wedding I’m often asked about this. When a couple comes from two different cultures, ethnicities or religious traditions, how do I blend their backgrounds into a cohesive ceremony? First and foremost, I am always deeply mindful that there be an absolute sense of equality and balance. No one [...]

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    Lois Heckman

    Lois Heckman is a certified Life-Cycle Celebrant who officiates at weddings, funerals, and other ceremonies in the Poconos and beyond. She has performed hundreds of ceremonies and brings a wealth of knowledge to her work. Visit her website: ... Read Full
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