Author Archives: Lois Heckman

The path to an honest ceremony

Customs, values, mores and traditions… they all change over time. If we didn’t expand our horizons, we’d still be living in caves. For some people the tradition of marrying in a house of worship is absolutely the way they want and need for their wedding ceremony. And that is great, if that is who you [...]

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Give Them Something To Talk About

Recently, I ran into a couple I’d officiated for, maybe 10 years ago, and they shared something wonderful. They told me that people still talk about how they ‘jumped over that stick’ at their wedding. WOW. Mission accomplished. Rituals are meant to be memorable. Sometimes, however, the most memorable part of a wedding isn’t the [...]

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Calling all nerds and geeks!!

Attention gamers, book lovers, pop culture fans, Harry Potter-philes and Buffy buffs, Zombie fighters and all nerds and geeks! Those words – geek, nerd – that were once pejorative, have become affirmative; it is now a good to be a nerd! You’ve gone mainstream! These two terms encompass quite a wide range of passions. They [...]

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A wee bit of Scotland

I’m excited to be heading to Scotland this summer, if only for a short visit, so I thought it was a good excuse to revisit some of their wedding traditions. I’m familiar with some, but there is always more to learn. I consider myself well versed in many Celtic rituals, which would encompass Scotland. Among [...]

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Giving Your Word

Going deep into choosing or creating the right wedding vows. Whatever type of wedding ceremony you are having, religious, spiritual, secular or civil, the exchange of vows is perhaps the most central element in the ceremony. It’s something I explore in depth with the couples I work with, and I’ve found they find it often [...]

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Symbols within symbols across cultures and traditions

Since this is a weekly column (and I’ve been at it for many years now) I can’t possibly stick to writing about wedding ceremonies every single time.  And I don’t often offer fashion advice or write from the perspective of a wedding planner, either. With me – it’s usually about the meaning of ceremony, and [...]

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Symbolism is everywhere

Each symbol has a story to tell, but whether it holds meaning for you is another story. As a celebrant, creating meaningful ceremony is my job (lucky me!). If I can infuse a wedding with special, specific symbolism, I’m a happy camper. When you think about it – just about everything in a wedding is [...]

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You don’t have to say ‘I do’ to the ‘Up-do’

As often as I officiate, I am still always struck by the beauty and meaning of weddings. Sometimes I even get a little misty-eyed, yes, after all this time. A wedding is quite a big milestone in life, and people make a lot of it. Well they should, but just how to do that is [...]

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Getting Married on Mother’s Day

Most couples choose not to have their wedding day on a holiday. But I have performed a few ceremonies on various holidays, and it’s important to include some mention of it. Christmas is a big one, of course, and Christmastime weddings can be awesome. I’ve also performed ceremonies on the Fourth of July, Memorial Day, [...]

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A Conversation Worth Having – Love doesn’t have to be blind

I didn’t think I’d ever write about something like this, it is a difficult topic in many ways. But why should it be taboo in a wedding column? So, the question is, should you consider a prenup, or is it just for the rich and famous? A prenuptial agreement, or prenup, is a legal written [...]

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    Lois Heckman

    Lois Heckman is a certified Life-Cycle Celebrant who officiates at weddings, funerals, and other ceremonies in the Poconos and beyond. She has performed hundreds of ceremonies and brings a wealth of knowledge to her work. Visit her website: ... Read Full
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