Tag Archives: Lois Heckman

When the officiant is an after-thought

If your ceremony is important to you, and in my way of thinking, nothing is more central to the wedding than the wedding ceremony… you know, the part where you are actually getting married, then don’t balk at a high celebrant fee that is still probably one of the smallest parts of your budget.

When your officiant is an after-thought you are short changing yourself. The opportunity to have a real, meaningful and unique ceremony creates one of life’s best moments. Isn’t that what you want for your wedding?

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The Evolution of Tradition

Traditions and customs change and evolve over the years. It’s true for most things and for weddings as well. I recently wrote about how some ancient customs were connected to fertility and survival in the ‘rain on your wedding day’ column. But if we go back only a few hundred years ago, or less, we [...]

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A Humanist Approach to Weddings

In a ceremony without any strict religious dogma, without prayers or scriptural readings, blessings or pronouncements about God, a Humanist approach can help express the couple’s values. Through their wedding ceremony they can declare to family and friends that they, too, are good people, who share values such as kindness, caring for others, and doing good in the world, just like their religious fellow humans.

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Rain Again!?

…if it rains on YOUR wedding day it may help to remember the connection between our ancestors and the very moment you are experiencing. A couple somewhere, so long ago, whether on the plains of North America, or some medieval farmer, was rejoicing that the rain came! And if you attend a wedding and it rains you can share the story behind the good luck and help make the day a little brighter.

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Partners in Planning

Here’s the important part: a wedding is not the sole purview of a bride. These are modern times, people! Examine your gender biases. Women – are you thinking this is your exclusive domain? Is this something you’ve planned and dreamed about for years? Or maybe you are a bit of a control freak. If so, you maybe be shutting out your partner.

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When it rains… it pours!

When I get calls from couples asking me to officiate at locations such as state parks, waterfalls and other outdoor locales, I always ask: what’s your rain plan? Many people have not given this any thought.

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Why Get Married?

I believe in marriage because, at its healthiest and best, it creates a place of safety, where two people can grow, as individuals and as a couple. It has proven to promote longevity, stability, health and wellbeing.

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The Common Threads of Finding Love

No matter how different the couple may appear to others, whether being of diverse nationalities, religions, or ethnicities, they speak of how they complement one another. Whether the reference point is Yin and Yang, Lucy and Ricky,or Jim Halpert and Pam Beesly, they fit together like pieces of a puzzle. This is sometimes called the ‘other half,’ or even ‘soul-mate.’

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Seeking understanding of world religions

Over the years I have written about many cultural and religious traditions. Along with Christianity, Judaism, Islam and Buddhism, I’ve written about Sikhs, Shintoism and Paganism. I’ve often explored Celtic customs, which I have found to be especially great for weddings, and Eastern European traditions, Native American, and various Hispanic traditions. The subject comes up [...]

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Variations on a Theme

There is an interesting intersection of the many customs and rituals of weddings. One with surprising commonalities is the African-American ‘jumping the broom’ and the Celtic ‘jumping the oak branch’. But today I want to talk about a tradition used in wedding ceremonies in Spain, Latin American countries, and the Philippines:The ‘arras’ or 13 Coins, sometimes even [...]

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    Lois Heckman

    Lois Heckman is a certified Life-Cycle Celebrant who officiates at weddings, funerals, and other ceremonies in the Poconos and beyond. She has performed hundreds of ceremonies and brings a wealth of knowledge to her work. Visit her website: ... Read Full
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